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Saturday, March 07, 2009

Something I Am Good At

Don't ever let me whine that I'm not good at anything because I am very good at barfing.

Some people [such as someone I'm married to] get sick on their stomachs and go to great groaning contortions to keep from throwing up. I don't get it. Just go get the job done; you'll feel much better, is my philosophy.

Last night I was at the kitchen table filling out the kids' student-convention forms, and I was hungry. So I ate a banana. I was still hungry. So I rummaged in the school-lunch-snacks bin and came up with Corn Nuts, which sounded nutritious because the only ingredients were corn, vegetable oil, and salt.

I did more paperwork and nibbled Corn Nuts. And then I began to have the distinct impression that maybe this snack was not such a good idea. But I finished the bag, of course, because I am a Yoder by birth.

All night long the banana and Corn Nuts fought in my stomach while wild dreams battled in my head. I woke up this morning thinking Man, if I didn't know better I'd think I had to throw up. I put some water on for tea. And then I went to the bathroom and threw up.

I am good at this--the little sharp intake of breath that brings it right up, keeping it out of my nose, making a quick, clean job of a very nasty business.

Quote of the Day:
"I'll take the triangle and you can have the trapezoid."
--Ben, cutting the last piece of cake for him and Jenny

5 comments:

  1. Of course men are not good at throwing up. First, they are babies when it comes to being sick. (WE just get grumpy and keep on going.) Second, they never get to be pregnant, so don't get to practice it over and over, ad nauseum.

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  2. I don't do very well at that. But now that you bring it up, I think I may be doing a heave sight better at it than I used to.

    Oh, and the Word Verification below seems a subliminal message of some sort: winsc.

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  3. Now the Word Verification is soakis.

    So Alaska is what?

    And for how long should I should the i's?

    Ah the mystery!

    ReplyDelete
  4. In my haste to get back to real living earlier today, I did a poor job editing my second entry.

    Instead of should I should, I meant should I soak.

    WV: glytic

    ReplyDelete
  5. Please tell me how you keep it out of your nose.

    ReplyDelete