Boys

"I wonder what would happen if I tried this" was Matt's mantra, back in the day. And then his brother Steven came along and it is downright uncanny how closely he follows in Matt's footsteps.

First comes the curious gleam in the eye at the sight of something that could possibly be tossed, ignited, bent, inserted, twisted, pulled, detonated, shot, or eaten. You can just see the wheels turning in the head--I wonder what would happen if I tried this.

And then he tries it. And more often than not, something is damaged, destroyed, or endangered in the process, at which point I pull out my lecture on A Little Bit of Common Sense, for Goodness Sakes, Is That Asking So Much?? and then I also make him pay for the damage, leading to envelopes in the desk drawer with such labels as Ceiling Replacement Fund.

This tendency reaches a fever pitch when boys are in the presence of their friends. We have had an extra boy in the house for over a week, while his parents are on a trip. Paul was gone for most of that time, and the combination nearly put me over the edge, the final straw being the ignited WD40 in the upstairs bedroom. By the mercy of God the house did not go up in flames, and the damage is limited to black marks that were not there before.

Matt assured me on the phone that it's all about trying to outdo each other when you're with a friend, rather than terrible gaps in our parenting.

I was sure things would improve once Paul got home.

Paul came home on a Monday evening and oh how happy and relieved I was to have him take things in hand and send the boys down the strait and narrow.

A few days later I was cooking some beans in the pressure cooker. Pressure cookers always make me nervous but I've gotten somewhat used to this one, and it was happily steaming away, the little jiggler on top rocking back and forth with little hisses of steam.

Paul came into the kitchen. As though propelled by an urge he wasn't even aware of, a remnant of boyish curiosity, he reached out and lifted the jiggler off the pressure cooker, which went PSSSHHHEEEWWWW!!!! with a very loud and angry hiss. Paul reacted with satisfaction rather than surprise or fear, and replaced the jiggler.

I thought, "I give up. I just give up."

Quote of the Day:
"Ben, I really don't like it when you do that Dad thing."
--Jenny, when Ben started pontificating about how she could remember to put her shoes away