Anthropology

One of my indulgences when I am in a big group is watching people and playing at being an amateur Margaret Mead.

I hadn't been in a big group of Mennonite youth like the bunch at Bonners Ferry since the Beachy Youth Fellowship Meetings in—goodness, was it 1980? I was utterly fascinated, then as now, with the fashions, the rituals, the interplay, the pecking order, the complicated dynamics under the surface. Only of course, back then, I was in the middle of things--utterly self-conscious about my clothes, seeking kindred spirits, scoping out the guys, and making snide comments about the fashion doll who had sewed shirts for her boyfriend to match all her dresses. This time I could watch, comfortable and amused, from the vantage point of middle age.

How things change, I decided. And how much they stay the same.

Mixed-gender dynamics have not changed a bit in all these years. As the various vanloads arrived, the girls greeted each other with enveloping hugs and wild shrieks that could be heard all over the gym and fellowship room--"SANDRAAAA!!!" The guys of course punched each other and laughed roughly.

In the cafeteria, the Established Couples ate at little tables on the side while the other guys and girls congregated at their own tables and peeled the foil off their hot sandwiches. The girls ate daintily and engaged in happy conversation while the guys slyly checked out the girls then wolfed their sandwiches, wadded up the foil, and chucked it at their friends.

How quickly, in such a group, the rebels find each other, the Nice People exude warmth and acceptance and inclusion to all, and the Cool Girls sashay in with dresses that make all the others seem dowdy.

One of the purposes of cape dresses*, I have often been told, is to free women and girls from the tyranny of fashion. But fashion must be hardwired into the genes, because even cape dresses pass through their own very distinct fashion phases.

Back in Iowa at the Fellowship Meetings, gathers were in. And "ties." All the cool Indiana girls showed up with gathers on their sleeves, their waists, their necklines, their yokes And most of these gathers were embellished with little fabric bows. No one from our church had as yet dared to try any of these, so we looked on in envy and felt backwards and plain.

How times have changed. Gathers are as "out" as polyester doubleknit. The current look is straight and sleek, from neck to sleeves to waist and clear down to the hem, with the occasional exception of a ruffle at the bottom. Not a gathered ruffle, but a drapey curved number that adds a chic little swish to the dress. Or a pleated ruffle. Or simply a band of fabric turned the other way so the stripes run horizontally.

As for length, long is in. The cool Pennsylvania girls played volleyball in dresses that swished their shoetops. "Mid-calf" was the prescribed length for us, back in the day, and we convinced ourselves of very loose definitions for "calf" and "mid" so that most of our dresses were not far below the knee. This weekend, I don't think I saw a single dress that was shorter than the dictionary-definition mid-calf.

Then there was the matter of camouflaging. In our day, we really didn't try to hide the fact that we wore capes, but when long sleeves were required, we got by with short-sleeved dresses by wearing long-sleeved sweaters over them. These girls camo'd their cape dresses with remarkable numbers of layers. Over a cape dress went a t-shirt, perhaps a polo, sometimes even an Aeropostale hoodie or a jean jacket. All layers stayed on through meals, volleyball, and uncomfortably warm temperatures in the sanctuary. Paul, who knows nothing of these nuances, was surprised at how "few" of the girls wore cape dresses. Amy and I laughed him to scorn, since we could tell at a glance what was a genuine skirt and what was a cape dress in disguise.

But then, who am I to chuckle in amusement at these young ladies? How well I remember how I wore a navy-blue long-sleeved polyester double-knit dress with a 3-inch-wide belt to the Fellowship Meetings on a hot, humid Iowa night--because it was as cool as I could get.

Yes, well, before long these young people will be all paired up and concerned with far more important things than impressing each other and wearing the latest fashions. And their children will look at their old photo albums and fall all over each other laughing.

*a dress with an extra piece of fabric over the bodice, from shoulder to waist, often the prescribed uniform for Amish and Mennonite women

Quote of the Day:
"Oh my goodness, that was like so yours!"
--one girl to another, during volleyball