Thursday, May 10, 2007

Like. . .Would You Mind??

Dear Sheriff's Deputy,

You pulled into our driveway today while I was out pressure-washing the north side of the house.

Now normally I don't mind people pulling into the driveway to turn around or whatever, but there's something about a car with SHERIFF on the side pulling in that makes me nervous. I'm funny that way.

So I industriously washed and wondered while you simply sat there in the car. My imagination was spinning faster than the stream of water from the pressure hose:
A) Matt crashed on his way to college and you were here to tell me he was horribly injured. . . or worse. And you were out there gathering up the courage to come tell me.
B) Someone with a vendetta against me turned me in for child abuse and you were here to haul me off.
C) Someone in the neighborhood did something illegal that I ought to have noticed and you needed me to testify against them or something.

And you kept sitting in your car. Gathering courage, I figured, which made me think that yes, for sure, something had happened to Matt.

Then. . . you backed out. . .and left!

Listen, next time, would you mind pulling in somewhere else to do your paperwork or whatever you were doing? I would like that.

from a well-behaved but paranoid citizen

Quote of the Day:
"Either all the extra feelings got siphoned off of Amy and onto me, or else Amy inherited no feelings from Dad and I inherited galoomphins of feelings from you."
--Emily, explaining the differences/genetics between her and Amy


  1. Although I'm laughing, that is a bit frightening. Sort of like when the firemen pulled up in the big red firetruck when I was babysitting as a teen, only to be selling tickets to some charity events. Glad your heartpounding encounter was entirely incidental.

  2. I'm like you but then I would probably have a guilty conscience thinking he was here for some traffic violation I thought I had gotten away with but was caught doing on a hidden camera!

  3. After a lot of thought...He probably decided that no one was growing anything illegal after all, at your he left!! :)
    I style of humor this Friday noon is kinda lacking..but hey at least try to laugh on dotted line(-----).

  4. And what about the time there actually was a policeman on my doorstep and John was no where around!!! My heart stopped. I was sure they were coming to ship us back to the USA!!! With weak knees I showed them all our passports and they left!!! I collapsed on the couch!!!