Tuesday, July 18, 2006

The Journey Continues

Last Sunday evening Paul's nephew Byran and his girlfriend Amy sang at church. It was beautiful, but seeing them reminded me of how much I enjoy watching my nieces and nephews date, fall in love, marry, and all that. And I realized I would never get to watch Leonard through this process. The "hot water bottle" in my chest (see July 11 post) got a violent punch and I "lost it" right there.

Yesterday we Smucker ladies made a trek to the Smith Family Bookstore in Eugene, mostly to resupply my SIL Laura who is home briefly from Poland. Laura lost five nieces and nephews in a car accident last November. "When do you stop bursting into tears at odd moments?" I asked her. And she said, "I haven't yet." And then she told me that just recently she and these children's mom had gone through the contents of the diaper bag that had been in the truck, and her nephew's little truck was smashed in just like the truck they had all been riding in. And then Laura, while telling me, promptly burst into tears.

But it was good to talk to her, and we both had a nice time with all the Smucker girls, shopping and talking and eating lunch. So life goes on and there is sunshine breaking through the clouds.

Let me add that the journey for my brother and his family is still just beginning and is still in "deep darkness." We would appreciate your continued prayers for them.

For today's
Quote of the Day
I'll cut and paste from Emily's blog:
Here is the difference between my family and your average American family. In a normal family, you might have a conversation go like this:
Betsy: Hey Sarah, is your refrigerator running?
Sarah: Yeah.
Betsy: You'd better go catch it!
Sarah: Ha Ha!

In my family, however, it goes like this:
Amy: Hey Jenny, is your refrigerator running?
Jenny: Yeah
Amy: You'd better go catch it!
Jenny: Ha Ha! Hey Emily, is your refrigerator running?
Me: Yeah, but I don't feel like catching it so you should.
Jenny: But I can't run all the way home and chase after the refrigerator!
Me: Well, maybe it's running this way.
Jenny: Here, refrigerator refrigerator refrigerator.
Amy: I think you'd better just stick with fridge.


  1. I remember someone telling me after my mom died of cancer over 20 years ago. It is still something I cling to through my recent grief, "Laura, never be afraid to cry." It means just being real and not putting on a facade that you aren't feeling anyway. And now my eyes are overflowing again...thinking and praying for you, Dorcas and all your family just now. God does give grace to face every new day.

  2. Hi, I found your blog by accident, and discovered, surprisingly, that I knew your nephew. I am so sorry for you loss. I worked at the bar that Cheri and Rick owned; Rick would bring Lenny in for lunch. He was always very nice, polite and always had a smile (no matter how badly I screwed up) for me.

    I am saddened to hear of what happened to him. I know he is greatly missed in Milbank.

  3. Wow, "Sherbears," what a small world. I figured I would never again run into any of Lenny's acquaintances from SD, and then you showed up here today. That's neat.

  4. Dorcas, I am sure your grieving will continue for a time. You will never forget your nephew. I've read that it can take up to a year to go through the grieving process. But I still remember my Mom & Dad. They will always be with me in spirit. I pray God will be with you as you continue to grieve. God is so good. Phyllis

  5. Dorcas,
    You and your family have been in my thoughts and prayers so much since I heard of your nephews death. I have followed your writings with great interest on here. I can identify with a lot of it. I have been though different deaths of close family members, expected and unexpected. It is never easy either way. And the question, "When do you quit bursting into tears at odd moments?" That is a question with out an answer. It hits you at the oddest times, even years and years later.

    When my husbands brother was killed 3 1/2 years ago, I remember it seemed I was dry-eyed so much while the rest of the family was crying. But my time came and the tears did roll. The only healing thing for grief, is time. And time only dulls grief, I don't think it ever totally goes away. God does care about us, and I never can imagine how someone gets through a death of a close person without God.

  6. Dorcas just dropping a note to let you know my thoughts and prayers are with you.

    And oh my, I can hardly bear to hear things like that little smashed truck.

    So many people in need of prayer...such a faithful and loving God He is to answer those prayers!

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