Tuesday, May 26, 2009


You know, the Bible says, "For even when we were with you, this we commanded you, that if any would not work, neither should he eat."

I am trying to teach my two teenage boys this amazing concept, that there is a connection between working and eating.

Especially the Carnivore, he who will, given the chance, eat meat--just meat--by itself, with no fillers like bread or rice--great slabs and piles of it, bacon and Little Smokies tossed into a frying pan, plain bunless hamburgers at a picnic, and so on. Of course, on some occasions he eats piles of tortillas and bread and such as well, but whenever he can get by with it he fills up on just meat.

Which is an expensive source of calories.

He will also eat half a dozen eggs a day.

And then he also mopes around at 9:30 a.m. muttering dark things under his breath, such as "Why do we have to get up so early?" and "How come we have to work so hard when it's vacation?" "Work so hard," we should clarify, is stuff like putting 25 dishes away and feeding the dog and gathering laundry, not exactly slaving in the salt mines.

So one of my many challenges this summer will be to get my boys to see a connection between that slab of ham on their plate and weeding the hedge.

Another challenge today is locating the source of that horrible smell in the vacuum cleaner. I am 95% convinced there's a dead mouse down in the bowels of the motor.

Quote of the Day:
Matt (setting down the boxes of food and stuff he's carrying for me): Wait, there's a really strong moment here I need to correct.
Me: Huh?
Matt: A moment is force times distance. It causes a rotation. It's like torque, basically.
Me: Ah.


  1. Is the Carnivore a visual or tactile learner? Maybe a model of a plaque-filled artery or a picture of the same would be instructive.

    Unfortunately I don't know of an object lesson to address the 9:30 AM grievances.

  2. Um, cooking the food connects the concept of 'work' with 'eat'. If he doesn't work to cook it, he doesn't get to eat it.

    My son is the carnivore as well. The doctor said, "Oh just put a variety before him, he will choose a balanced diet." Not!! And whoever said you could not gain weight on a high=protein, low-carb diet never met my son, the 8 1/2 year old, 5 foot hunk of lead (140#).

    Is your carnivor tall as well?

    Having broken my leg, my son had to mow the grass for an hour a day to feed the horses (rather than ME doing it) and in exasperation one day he said, "Why do we have to feed them TWO wheelbarrows a day? Why not just ONE?" So I explained to him that you could see their ribs and if someone turned us in for not feeding the horses enough, they would be taken away from us...He hasn't complained since. Of course, me offering to half his meals probably had an effect on that too....

  3. Are you sure we don't have the same son? Eveything you said sounds exactly like my 17 year old! Glad I'm not the only one! :)

  4. ummm, does Matt speak English??

    ooh - this one is too good to pass up! My word verification is "emiings" - which could be defined as "musings by Emily"!

  5. When you get it (the food-work connection) figured out, let me know. I have 2 15-year-olds like that. :o) Priscilla

  6. Let me know what bright plan you come up with to get your sons to enjoy their chores!! I have an 8 year old that thinks his chores are terrible. He has to do them everyday!!!Denise

  7. QOTD: HUH???? Pauline